Cancer updates

Last year about all I wrote about was cancer. I realized this weekend that it’s been a long time since my last cancer treatment update (in early October). Part of what got me thinking about it is that twice this past week a colleague didn’t seem to recognize me. I wonder if it’s because my hair looks so different. 

My curly hair this morning

For a while I'd been posting regular selfies during my treatment, in part because I didn't have all that much else to do, and in part because I kind of wanted to track the visual changes, which, aside from the hair were relatively minor. After I finished chemo, my hair started growing back, but at first it was a lot whiter than when I'd last seen it. Now I think the new growth is darker, but I didn't trim the white, so it has kind of a frosted look. It grew back slower on top, which makes for some weird length, but the most unusual part is the chemo curls.

this, apparently highly toxic, soft pastel from my daughter's drawing kit is taunting me

Apparently chemo damages the hair follicle, twisting it, which results in curls. That’s the explanation I’ve found, but it raises questions for me about naturally curly hair. Regardless, the curls are pretty normal for folks who’ve had chemo. They last 6 months to a year but can last longer. As someone whose straight hair never held a curl before, I’m enjoying having natural curls and even though the length is all over the place (thanks to the hair delayed regrow the on top), I’ve decided to keep everything I’ve got and enjoy it as long as it lasts.

boing boing curls

The curls have just reached the point where they make little spirals, or, as I would have called it when I was a kid, “boing boing curls.” If you wish for “boing boing curls” as a kid, you might just get that wish fulfilled after chemo 30 some years later. I'm pretty sure that as a kid I would have specified long "boing boing curls," but, as chemo ended in April, I may be getting close to the end of that type of growth.

the sculpture (right) as I left it at Christmas

The fact that I'm most interested in the hair, and I've been writing almost exclusively about my students' work for months, now, probably tells you what you need to know about my health (boring is good). I have been done with “active” treatment since September. In January I had my last meeting with my radiology oncologist who seemed to think my radiated skin looked good. She officially "released" me from her care, surprising me because I didn’t realize I was still under her care. The only hiccup was that I complained about some joint pain and that worried her (which worried me).

the other sculpture that I left even less complete over Christmas

In January I had my first post-surgery mammogram and that came back clear (about which I am much chiller now than I was then--when they didn't call with the results the next day I called them and told them they had to tell me or I'd worry all weekend). I also had my last weekly lymphedema appointment at the end of January. Which means that in February, I have no scheduled medical appointments of any kind! This is the first month since August of 2021 when I haven't have a medical appointment (or lots) related to my breast cancer!

both sculptures finished (and trying to keep the cats out at this point)

I‘m not done with treatment or appointments. I’m on five years of a daily pill and a shot every three months to stop my hormones. I have more lymphedema check ups, but they're spaced farther apart. At the start of March I have a pair of appointments my new oncologist and to get blood work to make sure the hormone stuff isn't causing major trouble. (Just the normal trouble of hot flashes and all that unfun menopause stuff.) Though some of them are decidedly not fun, I think that the symptoms have been fairly manageable. I can work just fine, I'm sleeping fairly well and I’ve gotten back into a sort of exercise routine of running with my daughter and doing some video workouts. I even went to yoga twice this month. 

old work and new work before and after glazing/firing

Mostly I’ve been focused on teaching and union work. In December I started some sculptures in my home studio that took ages to finish, not least because I got COVID when I was visiting my brother’s family at Christmas. But I finally finished building them and they are ready to fire whenever I get around to loading a kiln. This weekend I finally glazed a batch of functional work from who knows when. And that's all I've got, because between the glazing and the union and the classes I've told myself I'll squeeze in some rest this weekend!

Expressive Portrait, Glazed & Finished: Fall 2022

Last week, students in my Winter quarter class started building their solid portraits. I've been pretty busy so far this winter, so I had not gotten around to posting the finished sculptures created by my fall quarter class. 

painted solid portrait by Thai See

The solid built portrait project is probably my favorite hand-building project. I enjoy the format of the class, and the way the students separate into different tools and techniques, then come together for this solid building project. So this project is fun because we are all working together.

Kate Winslet as Clementine (from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) by Thai See

 

I also enjoy it because of the way the students work on this project. Most students use an armature, but they aren't required to do so. However, because the build is solid and fairly large, the first day consists mostly of hitting clay with paddles to make it stick to itself or the armature. It's hard not to enjoy such a physical project.

Charlie from Heartstopper by Amy Matson

I suppose it is also fun for me, because while the students are working hard, pounding on their pieces, making lots of noise and moving lots of clay around, I'm simply walking around, checking in with them, making suggestions, talking about their plans and proportions and the positiong of their armature.

Nien Nunb from Star Wars by Carlos Garcia Alcantar

On the second day of the project, they are cutting, hitting, and still making large changes to their project. Eventually they start to separate and work at different rates, but by the start of the second week or so, by design, they are all ready to cut. And again, that day, I'm walking through, thoroughly enjoying myself, while they are all cutting and hollowing and again making big changes to their projects.

Scream, by Amanda Goodrich, glazed

I never built this way, myself, in undergrad or in graduate school. I never really used an internal armature in my own work before I started teaching either. I've done so since, but I'm not even sure I had made and finished a full-side sculpture like this until my students had already done so in my class.

Scream, by Amanda Goodrich, side

This process is just a bunch of fun for me and the students seem to really enjoy it too, though I know it can also be frustrating--and some of them feel the frustration more than others, of course. Some of the students who feel frustrated with the project are those whose work looks great to me and their classmates, but who have really high expectations of themselves. These students may be bothered that their first portrait project isn't as perfect as they imagine it could be.

Medusa by Valeria Alvarez

Occaionally, I get a student who is so frustrated by the process that they end up disliking the end product. This happens in the throwing class sometimes, too. They expected the class to be easy or pure fun or something, but in the end they found it difficult and that somehow ruined the results for them. I find that both students who struggled and students who didn't appear to struggle can feel this way at the end of the quarter.

Two Geckos by Brooke Mason

Of course there are some students who struggle or dislike the project or their final results because they didn't really put in the time. I didn't really have that happen during most of the quarter this year, but it has happened in the past. 

Two geckos before firing by Brooke Mason

The clay can be unforgiving, breaking or squishing if handled incorrectly or worked on too wet or too dry. Just missing some studio time can result in clay that's too dry and needs to be entirely restarted. This isn't such a big deal on the wheel, most of the time, but it can be a major problem with a hand-building project that took weeks to build.

Dog by Yarelli Sanchez

The work I'm showing in this blog is (mostly) finished work as presented for the final critique. Students in the hand-building class had 5 builds during the quarter and they were required to glaze at least 4 of them. One of the 5 could be painted, the other 4 could be fired in the cone 10 kiln in a reduction or oxidation atmosphere, in the raku or pit firing, or in a low fire kiln. 

Dog by Yarelli Sanchez

Finishing the work mostly meant glazing or painting, and many students used underglazes with glazes. Horsehair raku firing was also an option, though none of the solid portraits ended up being finished with only horsehair raku (one was done with horsehair then re-fired).

Dog by Yarelli Sanchez

I also tell students that they can bring in non-ceramic materials after glazing and firing. This includes paint of course, but could also include epoxy, clear acrylic medium, hair, paper, or any other materials the student wishes to use. In the past students have added a dog collar, rubber, beads, staples and pieces of metal.

Dog by Yarelli Sanchez

This quarter, just two or three students used something besides paint. One added some acrylic medium to increase the shine on her piece after firing. Another added hair to her Gollum. Though Gollum doesn’t have a lot of hair, it makes a real difference. His particular hairstyle reminds me of when my hair was falling out near the beginning of chemo. 

Gollum by Amy Matson

Amy, who created Gollum, actually used her own hair. She shocked her classmate when she cut it off during class, yakima more than she probably needed. Whenever I’ve made sculptures that incorporate hair, I’ve used the fake kind that you can buy in a cheap hairclip—but maybe that’s because I knew I’d eventually lose it all. (Hmm, now I’m wondering why I didn’t save my hair that fell out for use in my future sculpture.

Bantha by Julia Snow

Hair and fur texture make a bit difference in making a sculpture look realistic, stylized, creepy, beautiful, or strange. In the fall, we had some pretty different approaches to hair and fur. Julia's Bantha has these tufts of fur, Yarelli's dog fur varies quite a bit across different parts of the body. Some others focused more on the form than the surface.

Bantha by Julia Snow

I can't wait to share images from this quarter, with student's permission, because we have some very different approaches to surface texture happening. I feel like each class cohort can have a very distinctive feel, energy, or approach. This quarter 6 students from fall are continuing into the Winter quarter, meaning this cohort combines new and continuing students. I've been kind of surprised how different the energy is. The winter group is a good group, they're making work and rising to the challenge of the class, but the humor and perspective is just a little different. It's a little bit difficult to name.

Dog on Pillow by Thunder Morales

I suspect part of the reason it feels so different is simply because half the class is working on different projects than the other. I've got six or seven beginners, doing the same assignments as the fall students, but with sometimes very different personal approaches. Then I've got 4 intermediates working on pretty independent and thus quite varied intermediate projects, and I've got 2 intermediate students who took the beginning class online or while I was on medical leave, which means their experience, background and perspective is pretty different.

Dog on Pillow by Thunder Morales

I'm definitely not complaining. I've been really happy with how the group has worked together even with the different projects. They've now completed two and a half builds, and I'm pretty much always happy when the builds get done. Some of them had to push a bit to meet the last deadline, but that energy (oh no! here comes the deadline!) can yeild some very interesting and surprising results.

Dwight from The Office by Jordan Golob

This week my three clay classes all start glazing. I'm looking foward to seeing what we get for the first firing, but I'm also interested to see how my intermediates approach glazing, having already had one or two quarters of experience prior to this class.

Derek Arneecher's Winifred after the second firing (with underglaze)